Unexpected

This is my first time trying this… so be gentle with me ladies!
The Gypsy Mama invites everyone to join her every Friday as she “stops, drops, and writes” for 5 straight minutes. No editing. No over thinking. No backtracking. No worrying if it’s just right or not. Oh my goodness, I’m not sure I can do this…

1… 2… 3… Here I go!

I always knew I’d love my kids. I always knew I’d be passionately attached to them. That I’d eat drink and sleep motherhood and that this whole gig would be the defining of me. I always knew that. I expected that.

But this I never expected.

My twenty-one year old daughter left this morning… off for the weekend with her friends. Ponytail bobbing along as she ran to the car in her red and white polka dot dress. With a petticoat underneath and a black cashmere sweater over top. Then she ran back for the cinnamon rolls she’d gotten up early to frost and pack into little red and white boxes. With a separate baggie full of wetnaps and napkins. Where does she get this stuff?

“Gosh girl, I’m gonna miss you this weekend,” I said as she leaned in for a quick hug.

“Oh yeah Mom, who’ll be there to make fun of all the silly things you do?”

“Seriously,” I laughed. “How will I know that I’m being weird if you’re not here to mock me for it, huh?”

“Text me!” She was halfway down the stairs. She held up her phone and waved it back at me as she ran across the driveway. “I can ridicule by text too!”

I never expected to spend so much time smiling. I just never expected being a mom would make me laugh so much. Oh yeah, I knew I’d love my kids….

I just never expected to like ‘em so much.

Troo confession time… I actually wrote for seven minutes.

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30 Responses to Unexpected

  1. 1
    Misty says:

    AMEN!
    my sentiments exactly.
    And then, during the really infuriating times- well- i never expected those emotions either!

  2. 2
    Katrina Jackson says:

    I love this. It reminds me of my relationship now with my Mom. Something we didn't always have when I lived there. Too much alike, I guess. You have beautiful, descriptive writing. Welcome to the Five Minute Friday family. :)

    Thanks for visiting and commenting.

  3. 3
    Chelsey says:

    Oh, I love this. And I can SO relate! :) In fact, kinda wrote along the same lines today. I have joyed more in motherhood than I ever thought I would. My heart… it's full.

  4. 4
    Carolyn Counterman says:

    Thank you for admitting that you ran over the time limit. I do that often. :)

  5. 5
    Barbara H. says:

    Well, that's pretty good for seven minutes straight writing!

    I know what you mean — what a blessing to like our kids as well as love them.

  6. 6
    Diane says:

    ahh well misty…. we just won't talk about that (at least not today;-})

    katrina… oh thanks so much honey. btw, i loved your post!

    carolyn… well i actually felt really guilty, so i needed to absolve myself somehow, lol.

    chelsey… well girl, i can't wait to read your post!

    barbara… i am usually just painfully slow with my writing. it takes me eons to get anything done because i go over it and over it. doing this was really intimidating for me…. and i am just itching to go back and fiddle with this post in the worst way…. so thank you so much for your complimentary words. they really mean so much:)

  7. 7
    Lenae says:

    You're right, we definitely were thinking along the same lines this morning. But it's a good line to be on, I'd say — how blessed are we that these beautiful gifts are so enjoyable, too :)

  8. 8
    Terri says:

    What a great blog….and I appreciate the extra 2 mintues too! Sounds like you are having a great day.

  9. 9
    Amy Jo says:

    Loved this post!

    Blessings

  10. 10
    Diane says:

    lenae.. i just had to smile when i read your post. we were right on the same wavelength!

    terri… i really think i coulda used an extra twenty minutes! this whole 5 minute thing is excruciating, lol.

  11. 11
    Trina says:

    Oh, Diane! I'm so proud of you!!!!! Your writing in the 'raw' has immense appeal and something so alive about it. Absolutely adored this two minute glimpse into your day and your beautiful mother's heart. Oh, and the humor you seem to have passed on to your daughter. LOL

    We forgive you for going over – I broke the rules too (shh – dont' tell – I only wrote for 3 min.! :P )

  12. 12
    Cassi says:

    Oh my goodness… soo true. I often wonder what I ever laughed at before our daughter was born and how incredible dull my life would be without her

  13. 13
    Nancy says:

    Hey! Thanks for coming by my blog…it's nice to meet new people. I love your Unexpected article…my daughter is rarely quiet and when she is then I know something is wrong or making her uneasy. Have a blessed evening.

  14. 14
    Diane says:

    thanks so much amy jo!

    aww trina, how sweet you are:) and hey, I just figured something out… you went 2 minutes under and i went 2 minutes over which means that we balance each other out which means that we didn't break the rules after all!
    kinda ;-)

    cassi… seriously! life without kiddos would be a very dull journey indeed.

    well nancy… thanks for coming to visit me!

  15. 15
    Ginger says:

    Hmm I might want to try this, I am trying to get back into more blogging. Not that I have a lot of followers, but hey one never knows.

  16. 16
    hopeannfaith says:

    How beautiful! Such a blessed lady … both. Loved this treasure!
    Welcome, glad to meet you here!
    Blessings,
    Andrea

  17. 17
    Ganeida says:

    Diane: we need to skype! Seriously. You need to add me & we'll set up a time.

    Loved this post ~ so imagine how I felt as, pony~tail bobbing, my girl gor on her plane for Chile! :(

  18. 18
    Kateri says:

    I love the way you write, Diane. And I will confess that I don't use a timer. As my husband says, rules are made to be broken. It is the spirit of the thing that counts!

  19. 19
    Diane says:

    christie… ((hugs)) to you my dear and i do have some thoughts for you too! i wasn't sure if you meant for your comment to be published or if you wanted me to answer it privately. i am more than happy to publish your comment, and in fact i think it might be helpful for other gals.. both to read your thoughts and to share their own thoughts. i didn't want to overstep tho! email me or comment back to let me know your preferences, ok? until then i want you to know that i am thinking about you and praying for you too…

    kateri… that hubby of yours sounds like a keeper;-)

    yes ganeida! yes, yes and a thousand times yes! i'll message you on fb later today my love:)

    ginger.. oh yes, do join in! it's loads of fun, and everyone is very understanding that one won't be producing a masterpiece in 5 minutes (or 7 minutes as the case may be, hehehe)

    andrea… it is so nice to meet you too:) and i loved your post. loved it.

  20. 20
    Jendi says:

    What a fun post! You did great on your first 5 minutes [or 7 min. ;) ]

    I'm so glad that you stopped by my blog because I enjoyed meeting you at Relevant, but don't think I ever got the name of your site.

  21. 21
    Diane says:

    jendi… it was so fun to meet you as well:) btw I finally got to see the video you made for trina's book (http://www.trinaholden.com/p/real-fast-food.html) and it is just adorable, seriously. now i know who to call if i ever need a video made. you are good girl!

  22. 22
    Becky K. says:

    Isn't that the truth!!
    I had to include Chelsea in my post today because she has just been so adorable lately!

  23. 23
    vivian says:

    thats awesome Diane! what a great post!
    xoxo
    vivian

  24. 24
    Diane says:

    i don't blame ya a single bit becky… she is one little cutie-pie for sure:)

    thanks viv… i have to tell you though it was torture to write so fast and not go back and edit. i actually put a video post up today for the express purpose of moving this one off the top of my page, lol. the errors and awkward sentences make me kee-razy:-/

  25. 25
    seekingmyLord says:

    Psst…I think the extra two minutes made all the difference. ;)

  26. 26
    Diane says:

    hehehe linda.. i think you just might be right;-)

  27. 27
    ~Jess says:

    Wonderful post! I think you've got this 5 Minute Friday thing down pat ;-)

    My mom loves it when she has the chance to tease me about something.

  28. 28
    Diane says:

    yeah jess… as long as my 5 minutes are 7 minutes long;-)

  29. 29
    Anonymous says:

    And it's great, isn't it, when we like our children as well as love them. It makes it even more fun to be a mother…God is good. Blessings to you, Diane!

    Brenda

  30. 30
    Diane says:

    many blessings to you too brenda☺

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Unexpected

OK… one thing you need to understand about being a single mom is that money is always an issue. It’s the worry that that wakes us up out of a sound sleep in the middle of the night; the one that makes our palms go clammy and our throat dry. It’s that sick worry that hits us in the pit of our stomach at the most unexpected times. The truth about not-enough-money might be the only thing we’ve ever lied to our kids about. It’s always playing in the back of our minds. It’s always there. Nagging.
Alrighty, now that we’ve got that unpleasantness out of the way, on to my post (and don’t worry, you’ll be smiling at the end. I promise.)


For several years now, I have become disenchanted with the whole gifts-at-Christmas thing. Don’t get me wrong… I love giving gifts and for goodness sakes, I love getting them too. But recently all the choosing, buying and making of gifts has become an overwhelming part of the season for me. It’s become unpleasant and I haven’t liked it. I had started to dread the holiday season. And that made me sad. So I began to think about having a gift-less Christmas. I started indulging in fantasies of an entire holiday expanse with no gifts to worry about. Nothing to buy. Nothing to make. Just calm, peaceful weeks leading up to the birth of my beloved Savior… weeks in which the children and I could spend time in grateful contemplation for all He has given us. In gratefulness for gifts already received. And in my mind, that became the better way to celebrate Him.

Fast forward to this year and a perfect storm of financial icky-ness which has left me with no money to spend on gifts. But instead of the Lord guiding me into that gift-less Christmas as I would have anticipated, it seems that we will be having one of our most lavish and abundant Christmases ever. Out of the blue and out of the dark, a group of folks from an online message board stepped forward to provide gifts and funds for our family. They didn’t know of my specific money woes this year. I don’t know a single one of these folks. I’ve never met them, have never seen them in passing. We’ve never exchanged emails or Christmas cards. We live in wildly different places and live our lives in wildly different ways and yet they were moved to express their generosity to my children. To me. And so here I am… Amazon gift lists practically empty, enough money in my PayPal account to pay for a bit of fabric and what will probably be an embarrassing overabundance of candy. And eyes that well up in tears at the most unexpected times. Pretty amazing huh?

Amazing that my longings for a “holier” celebration of Christmas were not fulfilled. It seems the Lord had a different plan. When I would have chosen to honor Him with sacrifice, He has chosen to make Himself known through joy and abundance.

Just when I think I’ve gotten Him all figured out, He pulls some crazy stunt like this.

In case you couldn’t tell, this is a Christmas tree inside a heart
and Noah drew it for you.

Yes, you.
All of you… and you know who you are.
mmhmm

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37 Responses to Unexpected

  1. 31
    Misty says:

    AMEN!
    my sentiments exactly.
    And then, during the really infuriating times- well- i never expected those emotions either!

  2. 32
    Katrina Jackson says:

    I love this. It reminds me of my relationship now with my Mom. Something we didn't always have when I lived there. Too much alike, I guess. You have beautiful, descriptive writing. Welcome to the Five Minute Friday family. :)

    Thanks for visiting and commenting.

  3. 33
    Chelsey says:

    Oh, I love this. And I can SO relate! :) In fact, kinda wrote along the same lines today. I have joyed more in motherhood than I ever thought I would. My heart… it's full.

  4. 34
    Carolyn Counterman says:

    Thank you for admitting that you ran over the time limit. I do that often. :)

  5. 35
    Barbara H. says:

    Well, that's pretty good for seven minutes straight writing!

    I know what you mean — what a blessing to like our kids as well as love them.

  6. 36
    Diane says:

    ahh well misty…. we just won't talk about that (at least not today;-})

    katrina… oh thanks so much honey. btw, i loved your post!

    carolyn… well i actually felt really guilty, so i needed to absolve myself somehow, lol.

    chelsey… well girl, i can't wait to read your post!

    barbara… i am usually just painfully slow with my writing. it takes me eons to get anything done because i go over it and over it. doing this was really intimidating for me…. and i am just itching to go back and fiddle with this post in the worst way…. so thank you so much for your complimentary words. they really mean so much:)

  7. 37
    Lenae says:

    You're right, we definitely were thinking along the same lines this morning. But it's a good line to be on, I'd say — how blessed are we that these beautiful gifts are so enjoyable, too :)

  8. 38
    Terri says:

    What a great blog….and I appreciate the extra 2 mintues too! Sounds like you are having a great day.

  9. 39
    Amy Jo says:

    Loved this post!

    Blessings

  10. 40
    Diane says:

    lenae.. i just had to smile when i read your post. we were right on the same wavelength!

    terri… i really think i coulda used an extra twenty minutes! this whole 5 minute thing is excruciating, lol.

  11. 41
    Trina says:

    Oh, Diane! I'm so proud of you!!!!! Your writing in the 'raw' has immense appeal and something so alive about it. Absolutely adored this two minute glimpse into your day and your beautiful mother's heart. Oh, and the humor you seem to have passed on to your daughter. LOL

    We forgive you for going over – I broke the rules too (shh – dont' tell – I only wrote for 3 min.! :P )

  12. 42
    Cassi says:

    Oh my goodness… soo true. I often wonder what I ever laughed at before our daughter was born and how incredible dull my life would be without her

  13. 43
    Nancy says:

    Hey! Thanks for coming by my blog…it's nice to meet new people. I love your Unexpected article…my daughter is rarely quiet and when she is then I know something is wrong or making her uneasy. Have a blessed evening.

  14. 44
    Diane says:

    thanks so much amy jo!

    aww trina, how sweet you are:) and hey, I just figured something out… you went 2 minutes under and i went 2 minutes over which means that we balance each other out which means that we didn't break the rules after all!
    kinda ;-)

    cassi… seriously! life without kiddos would be a very dull journey indeed.

    well nancy… thanks for coming to visit me!

  15. 45
    Ginger says:

    Hmm I might want to try this, I am trying to get back into more blogging. Not that I have a lot of followers, but hey one never knows.

  16. 46
    hopeannfaith says:

    How beautiful! Such a blessed lady … both. Loved this treasure!
    Welcome, glad to meet you here!
    Blessings,
    Andrea

  17. 47
    Ganeida says:

    Diane: we need to skype! Seriously. You need to add me & we'll set up a time.

    Loved this post ~ so imagine how I felt as, pony~tail bobbing, my girl gor on her plane for Chile! :(

  18. 48
    Kateri says:

    I love the way you write, Diane. And I will confess that I don't use a timer. As my husband says, rules are made to be broken. It is the spirit of the thing that counts!

  19. 49
    Diane says:

    christie… ((hugs)) to you my dear and i do have some thoughts for you too! i wasn't sure if you meant for your comment to be published or if you wanted me to answer it privately. i am more than happy to publish your comment, and in fact i think it might be helpful for other gals.. both to read your thoughts and to share their own thoughts. i didn't want to overstep tho! email me or comment back to let me know your preferences, ok? until then i want you to know that i am thinking about you and praying for you too…

    kateri… that hubby of yours sounds like a keeper;-)

    yes ganeida! yes, yes and a thousand times yes! i'll message you on fb later today my love:)

    ginger.. oh yes, do join in! it's loads of fun, and everyone is very understanding that one won't be producing a masterpiece in 5 minutes (or 7 minutes as the case may be, hehehe)

    andrea… it is so nice to meet you too:) and i loved your post. loved it.

  20. 50
    Jendi says:

    What a fun post! You did great on your first 5 minutes [or 7 min. ;) ]

    I'm so glad that you stopped by my blog because I enjoyed meeting you at Relevant, but don't think I ever got the name of your site.

  21. 51
    Diane says:

    jendi… it was so fun to meet you as well:) btw I finally got to see the video you made for trina's book (http://www.trinaholden.com/p/real-fast-food.html) and it is just adorable, seriously. now i know who to call if i ever need a video made. you are good girl!

  22. 52
    Becky K. says:

    Isn't that the truth!!
    I had to include Chelsea in my post today because she has just been so adorable lately!

  23. 53
    vivian says:

    thats awesome Diane! what a great post!
    xoxo
    vivian

  24. 54
    Diane says:

    i don't blame ya a single bit becky… she is one little cutie-pie for sure:)

    thanks viv… i have to tell you though it was torture to write so fast and not go back and edit. i actually put a video post up today for the express purpose of moving this one off the top of my page, lol. the errors and awkward sentences make me kee-razy:-/

  25. 55
    seekingmyLord says:

    Psst…I think the extra two minutes made all the difference. ;)

  26. 56
    Diane says:

    hehehe linda.. i think you just might be right;-)

  27. 57
    ~Jess says:

    Wonderful post! I think you've got this 5 Minute Friday thing down pat ;-)

    My mom loves it when she has the chance to tease me about something.

  28. 58
    Diane says:

    yeah jess… as long as my 5 minutes are 7 minutes long;-)

  29. 59
    Anonymous says:

    And it's great, isn't it, when we like our children as well as love them. It makes it even more fun to be a mother…God is good. Blessings to you, Diane!

    Brenda

  30. 60
    Diane says:

    many blessings to you too brenda☺

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